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Page 1
Top 10 Ways to Celebrate New Year's Eve in the Middle East
by Jason Roth
- Watch the dead goat drop.
- Hold a cocktail party at the Hamas headquarters, black tie and self-detonating explosives optional. (BYOB - Bring Your Own Bomb)
- Make a New Year's Fatwa to lose weight.
- Get drunk and whip your Hizballah buddies in the ass with your head towel.
- Have a dinner party with leftover American food drops.
- Set off the noise makers in your sneakers.
- Pass out the cocktail weenies and Jello shots and stone an adulteress to death.
- Kiss your 50 wives for good luck.
- Rent a stretch camel and hit the town in high heels and your shortest mini-burka.
- Play drinking games with Al-Qa'ida. (Osama's the Asshole!)
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