Comments, Love Letters, and Death Threats
Comment Archive 15
The posts below were made from November 14, 2003 to December 25, 2003.
You can also visit our previous comment archive.
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Your idiotic drivel is barely worthy of a comment, but I will
make an exception. I have noticed that the biggest chickenshits and
cowards like yourself are always banging the war drum, screaming for
blood and severed heads of the enemy, yet cowardly jews like yourself hide
behind a computer screen and let others do the butchering for you and
You need a good bitch-slapping, you cowardly bastard- what an idiot you
are! I would be willing to bet you think that you are brilliant, yet
your infantile comments are about on a third grade level, and your
attempts at intellectuallity are pathetic.
If you want something worthwhile to do, spend a little time
investigation the crimes of BushCo., Inc., and that will keep you busy for the
next ten thousand years, you stupid sheep!! Merry Christmas!! If you have
the guts to reply to this, which I doubt, I will send you some
information that you apparently missed that will make your hair stand on end,
and renounce your idiotic so-called religion....
Editor's Note: Sorry, the name "Roth" is German, not Jewish. Maybe that's why I could suffer through only ten minutes of Adam Sandler's "Eight Crazy Nights". (JR)
December 25, 2003 at 18:24:07
Subject: Use of apostrophe, for fuck's sake!
"Stu Fucksworthy, the plastic-faced asshole who's primary
talent consists of 'playful banter'"
Jason, I'm sure you know that you should have written "whose" not
"who's"; if you make fun of people's literacy, don't give them any reason to
do the same.
Respect and Happy New Year! (Ha ha, how fucking culturally insensitive
Keep up the good job!
Editor's Note: Thank you for the correction, my Ukrainian friend. BTW, I saw a bunch of your ex-amigos recently at the Klitschko/Johnson fight at Madison Square Garden. (Although I'm just assuming those things they were waving weren't Jamaican flags.) And here I thought all this time that every Ukrainian in NYC was a stripper. (JR)
December 24, 2003 at 09:36:03
Name: Calvin Watkins
Subject: Your site
First of all, I would like to say I find your site greatly amusing. When I find life kicking my ass, I always turn to your site for inspiration or just a good laugh. Not that I use it as a crutch, that's what beer is for. The reason I am writing this email is, although you might deem it useless small-talk and a waste of your time, is that one of the more amusing instances of my life occured when I carried out #40 on your 41 stupid things to do in a Men's Public Restroom. This had happened before I read your list, I didn't really read the list and think "well I think I'll try a few of these". Basically, I followed my friend out of the bathroom at the movies one day and announced in a loud speaking voice that he hadn't washed his hands, when in fact he didn't. The hilarity ensued when he got pissed off the next day, because of course, his date was standing right there waiting for us to come out. You gotta have fun somehow while being the third wheel I always say.
Editor's Note: I like it. In fact, I really think you're on to something. Being third wheel should have its privileges. An entire paradigm shift in the definition of "sociable" should occur. (There, after more than a thousand html pages, I've not only used the phrase "paradigm shift" for the first time, I've also used it in a sentence written in the passive voice. Something to be proud of.) (JR)
December 22, 2003 at 10:54:49
you guys suck
Editor's Note: Impressive. You've succeeded in formulating bad grammar with a single word. A "subject" is a noun. Therefore, I believe the intended subject of your post is "sucking". In the future, please tell me that I suck using proper English. (JR)
December 21, 2003 at 12:59:48
Subject: baby baptism article
I think you rock! I read your articles on fat girls, baby
baptisms and the I Am Sam unseen movie articles, and you say what I am
afraid to say. You are a brave individual. You don't conform to what
people want you to be just so they'll be friends with you (I have to learn
to be myself, not what other people want me to be).
Keep writing. The world needs more brutally honest people in it.
Editor's Note: I'm all in favor of bravery, and I'm all in favor of bragging. But let's be honest. There's nothing gutsy in sitting behind a computer and spouting shit. The only thing mildly brave that I do is to sign my name to what I write. When I talk to everyone as I write, I'll let you know. (JR)
December 20, 2003 at 22:24:10
Name: John Vasile
Subject: mel gibson's ass
Just came across your article when I was doing a random search on "Mel Gibson's Ass." I had been talking about my 'Emporer's New Clothes" theory regarding how people are fed a point of view by the media, which they then accept without really thinking about what they're saying or taking the time to examine the issue or image and develop their own opinion.
This is all to say that I've always thought that Mel Gibson's ass is the subject of one of the biggest Emporer's New Clothes scams going. If you actually look at what all the hoopla's about, you'll find a rather unspectacular specimen.
Just some thoughts.
Editor's Note: Are you criticizing my taste in men's asses? That's ok, I've always prided myself in my ability to take criticism. (JR)
December 18, 2003 at 12:36:12
Subject: Penis Enlargement
I wanted to inform you about a great site I found for
lots of penis pills - Quick2You.
They sell the new Alpha Male Plus which is advertised huge in
magazines. I've been on it for a while now and noticing an effect. A little
increase in size, but i'm also in the mood a lot more. I like sex a lot more now
and my wife tells me i'm better in bed. Go figure.
They also have herbal vivid which is taken by adult film stars. That's
how they get those super long erections. I have a friend on herbal
vivid and he swears by it. It's cheap too.
This quick2you site is great. Everything is in stock, fast shipping,
trackable via ups. They also have toll free tech support.
Their website is:
Hope my opinion helps.
Editor's Note: The world famous Jake: spamming the Internet one website at a time. (JR)
December 15, 2003 at 22:43:23
Name: Something Pithy
Subject: The Man Who Would Be Clown
I really like your social commentary, but goddamn your story
about substance R and Gary the aspiring clown with credit card debt
chugged urine. Stick to what you do best, calling societies bullshit.
Leave the fiction to the mentally unstable jitterheads, like Ann Coulter.
Editor's Note: Thanks, I appreciate the tough love. Maybe my implementation sucked, but I have to say, your description of it sounds pretty funny. (JR)
December 14, 2003 at 09:11:27
Name: Col. Lingus
Subject: Google letter
That was lame. You'd have to be a real geek to laugh at it,
and an even bigger geek to write it.
Editor's Note: How much of a geek would you have to be to post a comment about it? (JR)
December 13, 2003 at 02:29:50
Subject: Battlestar Galactica tagline
On my first day back on your site after a long hiatus (of
forgetting to check because you don't send out update emails anymore, not
that I particularly mind), I briefly fell for the Google joke, and then
very much enjoyed your comments on the Battlestar Galactica tagline
with its subtle emotional subtext of "playing God blah blah". Such
bite-sized cliches that almost everyone agrees with, that seem innocuous and
were probably written without thought but nevertheless carry disturbing
philosophical implications are so common these days, are so rarely
noticed. I short, props to you as always.
Editor's Note: I watched the first two episodes of the series, and yes, the phrase "playing God" was uttered. I actually wouldn't have minded, if the politically-correct characters weren't so damn dull. (JR)
December 12, 2003 at 03:40:13
It is impossible to satire environmentalists. Just when you
think you've done it (as in Animal Rights Group Petitions for Animal
Prisons), they find a better punchline.
Editor's Note: "The problem is that a protected bird is eating protected fish." Fucking classic. (JR)
December 12, 2003 at 02:30:56
Name: Olympic Watch
Subject: Human rights and democracy in China, Beijing 2008
Check out our website: we monitor the human rights situation
in China and campaign for its improvement before Beijing 2008. China
needs to match its impressive economic growth with political
liberalization and respect for human rights.
Editor's Note: It's amazing that people think trading with a murderer will stop him from murdering. (JR)
December 10, 2003 at 09:37:02
Subject: Ha ha ha haaaaaa!
You are one messed up person!
I would do anything to meet a nice girl, but you can't stand them. You
better warm up or else you'll be living a life of celibacy!
Editor's Note: You'd love an unopinionated bimbo who smiles perpetually and never disagrees with anyone. Keep looking. You won't have a problem finding one. (JR)
December 7, 2003 at 20:49:33
Name: Linus Riesnert
Subject: fucking language
I noticed the following:
When you say:
"That thing is right!"
then some people listen to it and see that that thing is right
or they would at least think about it.
But when you say:
"That thing is damn right you fucking moron."
then those who already knew it was right anyway would laugh about that statement. But many others would quickly shut down and give a hell wether that thing was actually right or not.
The message got lost in the fucking language.
I really love this web site. There's just too few advocating objectivism. I think this site shouldn't be made for objectivists only,
it should also address people of other (wrong) ways of thinking.
Keep it going guys.
Editor's Note: I see you point. The problem is, when I say "That
thing is damn right you fucking moron", I'm saying it
because I don't believe any honest person wouldn't
come to the same conclusion. This doesn't mean that I
think everyone already knows the things I say before I
say them (otherwise, why would I bother saying them?)
What it means is that honest people will say "Of
course", and agree with me, thus putting themselves on
the side of the non-fucking-moron.
At times, I'm more patient about explaining things.
These are the things I think honest people might come
to different conclusions about. But there are plenty
of issues I think are obvious to any honest person. I
don't have patience for the dishonest.
I also think, in the cases when an honest person might
not instantly agree with the point I'm making "you
fucking moron", they won't let the words "you fucking
moron" distract them from being honest with
themselves. You might say, while reading The
Fountainhead and Atlas Shrugged, that Ayn Rand
bitch-slapped me a little bit with her bluntness and
lack of tolerance for the irrational. But I could take
it. If she had "softened" her writing up at all, the
seriousness would have been diluted. In fact, her
ideas would have seemed more like a pipe dream. For
the same reason, I will not soften my own writing. If
my ideas are ever poorly communicated, that is a flaw.
Communicating the ideas with emotion is not.
The one aspect of writing in which Ayn Rand kicked
ass, and most current Objectivist writers suck ass, is
writing about ideas with passion. Most Objectivist
writing makes you wonder (a) whether the writer
actually gives a shit about what he's writing about,
or (b) why the writer has chosen a field of endeavor
that puts people to sleep.
You might want to think about why you love the
website, and whether you would still love it without
the "you fucking moron" comments. If I eliminated that
stuff, you'd probably tell me to stop being a fucking
pussy and get back to my old self. (JR)
December 7, 2003 at 13:48:30
Subject: Get Over It, You're Obviously Gay
The very fact that you're soooo uncomfortable leads everyone
to believe that; either you're gay and can't hadle it yet or you have a
VERY small penis and feel inferior. Who cares who's naked around you,if
your a real man,your not checking them out and they're not checking you
out. Get over it,you know you secretly want to be fucked by a guy,and
if you say no,by what you've told us,you're a big liar...
Editor's Note: When you're in a locker room, other guys' old, wrinkled, hairy-backed bodies are going to be in front of you whether you like it or not. I doubt I would like the experience much even if I were gay. (Even a women's locker room is probably only interesting 25% of the time.) I just don't understand why things like group showers would exist in a civilized country. I also don't understand why group same-sex nudity would be a concept you feel is worth defending. (JR)
December 5, 2003 at 21:34:47
Subject: anti war
i just wanted to say.. it really pisses me of that we're in
the middle of a war and some arseholes always find time to NOT go to work
and instead spend time harrasing the leader of a country that has stuck
by us thick and thin.
You lot can keep whatever brits you have in guantanamo.. you're more
likely to fry them for it... be my guest, or let em rot. I don't even
consider them to be british.
like i said, i just wanted to say.
Editor's Note: It's very easy to judge the pro-terrorist crowd. Just look at their priorities. (JR)
December 4, 2003 at 12:53:21
Subject: one more to amuse yourself with a bum
i asked a bum if i could borrow his car, yes, yes i did.
Editor's Note: Once a bum asked me for a cigarette and without thinking, I apologized that all I had to offer him was a clove cigarette. I was actually apologizing for not having a sufficient menu of tobacco offerings. Intent to correct my error, I told him that if he didn't like it, I could take him down the block and buy him something else. While my friend was standing next to me most likely wondering what the hell I was up to, the bum actually knew I was kidding and laughed. Thinking back on it now, I bet it was one of the few times someone actually had the courtesy and respect to fuck with the guy. (JR)
December 1, 2003 at 23:43:38
Subject: dating jesus
i thought you might like this site, especially the mailbag:
i always wanted to buttfuck the almighty!
Editor's Note: It's interesting that Jesus endorses Egyptian bath towels and Fiskars scissors. I expected him to be more of a robes and crucifixes kind of guy. (JR)
December 1, 2003 at 07:13:34
Name: Horst and Dorothy
Subject: the true meaning of Christmas
re Jason Roth's "the true meaning of Christmas" thought we'd point out the flaw:
The word "Christmas" means "Mass of Christ," later shortened to "Christ-Mass." The even shorter form "Xmas" - first used in Europe in the 1500s - is derived from the Greek alphabet, in which X is the first letter of Christ's name: Xristos, therefore "X-Mass."
so one can't get away from the "religious" aspect of it..!!!
Editor's Note: Damn, a quick Web search shows that you are correct. That water-walking mutant was the world's first X man. (JR)
November 29, 2003 at 16:58:14
Subject: An Atheist Goes Undercover
God, how I laughed imagining you saying, "No," to all the
religious questions! I admire your ability to take a calm confident stand
on what is true. I vow to refrain from using your name in vain, Jason.
Editor's Note: Thank you, but do feel free to damn things in my name. (JR)
November 27, 2003 at 14:38:56
Subject: things to do at work when you're braindead
Mucho appreciation-ola for the grins provided here... its good to see
that not all Americans are 7th Day Adventists or raving Republicans...
keep up the good free-thinking blasphemy... dont let the bastards drag
Editor's Note: It's not often that I get accused of not being a Republican. It's nice when I am. (Unfortunately, I can't say I have any idea what the hell "ayup" means.) (JR)
November 25, 2003 at 06:38:29
Subject: What a world, what a world...
I am reminded of the "wicked" witch melting in her own
"What a world, what a world" So much time looking at what is different,
when our differences are what make this life so interesting. Somewhere
along the way from childhood, we stopped admitting "I don't know",
assuming that we would understand when we are older. Loosing sight of how
everything that happens to us is how we learn. We will never know
everything. We don't have to act like we do. We can just accept that there
are things in this life that we do not know. And that is okay.
If we can do this, maybe we can stop judging everyone else out there.
The how's and why's of things are not ours to have. It's not us against
the world. It's we are the world. It's not what you think you are but
what you think, you are. We are...
Editor's Note: Which Justin Timberlake song did you rip off your philosophy from? Your most amusing moment comes after you assert your knowledge of "how we learn", then you proceed to admit that the "how's" are not yours to have. Do everyone a favor, and try to stay off the pot, poetry, and Marx. (JR)
November 24, 2003 at 16:50:09
Name: Dan G.
Subject: The walls bled when I entered...
Yeah, I found myself goat-roped into entering those alters of
servitude to the void for a friend's wedding. I also found myself
asking a lot of the same questions. I decided that I would go to other
ceremonies held in church just for the sheer satisfaction of making the
dummies numb. It's great that you got a chance to actually answer "no"
to all of those stupid questions, all I got to do was to not bow my head
during prayer (and yes tons of people were peeking up to catch
"cheaters"). The other thing that occurred to me was that every wedding that
I've ever attended in church was more like a funeral. At the wedding
two people who don't love each other bury their respective self-esteems
for fear of not being married. At the funeral, the shell that was
hollowed at the wedding gets tossed in the ground. Anyway, visit church
often and stir shit up, the plankton don't deserve their tranquility.
Editor's Note: I've been to at least one wedding in which the husband and wife loved each other. It's just too bad they weren't each other's husband and wife. Just kidding. Actually, I've been to two weddings of people who loved each other. But the guy looked so nervous and awkward both times, it didn't look the slightest bit enjoyable, let alone sacred. Also, let me add that love is too sacred to have anything to do with a church. (JR)
November 24, 2003 at 14:50:44
Subject: Rush Limbaugh Rehab Update
I just wanted to report that while Rush was in rehab, McNabb
and the Eagles went a perfect 5-0. They won again yesterday (even
though Rush is out of rehab and into money laundering). Maybe it was all the
pills that made Rush say that stupid shit. Philly should go to the
Super Bowl (and get their asses kicked by New England) just to show Rush
what a shitty sports commentator he was.
Editor's Note: Your hatred for Limbaugh is clouding your judgment. As far as I know, Limbaugh was commenting on how McNabb was playing at the time, not how he might play once Limbaugh went into rehab. But I agree. I only saw Limbaugh a couple times on ESPN, but I thought he was pretty bad. Not because he was controversial, but because he was superficial and decidedly uncontroversial. (JR)
November 24, 2003 at 13:28:49
Subject: that article
this guy who wrote this article is a fucking douche bag and
has no right to live anymore
Editor's Note: I'm impressed. You said so little in so few words. (JR)
November 23, 2003 at 16:51:53
Name: David Buchner
Subject: Hello! Develop a Larger Penis in Weeks
"Mackay said such firms gave a bad name to the penis
That is so funny I can't say anything about it.
I wonder what that girl on the bus in Florida thinks about her tight
pants being on the news.
Editor's Note: You're referring to the girl who had the pleasure of witnessing the school bus beating. I bet that whole experience scared the pants off her. On second thought, no goddamn way. (JR)
November 23, 2003 at 10:54:08
Subject: Savage interview
You had an Interview with Leonard Peikoff on the Michael
Savage show, do you still have it? because i would like to hear it, and if
you don't have it do you know where i could get it?
Editor's Note: Nope, it looks like the link I had is dead now (as you obviously discovered). I forget exactly what Peikoff said in that interview, but he's since freaked out a bit. In his Ford Hall Forum lecture, he failed to acknowledge that modern military technology, in certain circumstances, allows us to avoid civilians without weakening our mission. He equated today's warfare with that of World War II. (JR)
November 22, 2003 at 20:14:36
Subject: wEIRD NEWS STORIES
I saw that you have a "weird news" section, if you want more
weird news there is a website called newsfilter.org that is dedicated
to werid news.
its like a bizzaro Drudge Report.
Editor's Note: Looks like a good place to waste time. (JR)
November 22, 2003 at 19:59:40
Hey there, I sure do hope you lose your pathetic job and
become homeless and we'll see if you are a man or not. Do you think you can
survive with no money, no food, no shelter, no warmth, dirty clothes,
no shower and like you say "no pride" I hope to see that and laugh my
ass off because you fail the first day and call your mother collect and
cry like the baby you are!!!
Editor's Note: Damn right I'd call my mom. But I can proudly say that I wouldn't sell the goddamn "Homeless News" to half-awake subway passengers. I'd be more interested in doing something that made money. (JR)
November 20, 2003 at 20:24:18
Subject: suicide bombing/hate crime
I'm so glad that finally more people are waking up to the
fact that according to the so-called "hate-crime" laws, only Whites commit
hate crimes. This is bullshit! It's obvious that those laws were
designed ONLY to cut balls off of any White person who does anything other
than kiss minorities asses, and allow everyone who hates them into their
countries, including but not limited to, ones who fly planes into
Editor's Note: I say we stop using the term "minority" to describe someone of a particular race. This is a bullshit, collectivist term meant to give more political power to racial groups. The idea of an individual "minority" being fundamentally different than an individual "majority" is absurd. (JR)
November 20, 2003 at 18:57:20
Subject: Reality TV: A Fair Interpretation of Society?
What do you think about "Reality TV" and how it either
represents or misrepresents society as a whole?
Editor's Note: Thanks for the question. I answered you here. (JR)
November 20, 2003 at 09:46:42
Name: some chick
Subject: penis patch
This ad is stupid for i get at least 10 a day and don't even
Editor's Note: You don't have one? Well, that's why they're offering you one! Oh, you mean you don't have a... Never mind. (JR)
November 19, 2003 at 13:44:02
What really pisses me off is that on OCTOBER 30th some
asshole radio stations decided it was a good idea to play Christmas Music. I
mean I love it as much as the next guy, after Thanksgiving.
Editor's Note: I may have heard enough of it, too. At least don't play that goddamn U2 Xmas song. (JR)
November 17, 2003 at 12:54:45
Subject: The Psychological Peeping Tom
"Perverted men opt for the physical - the naked body.
Perverted women opt for the psychological. Men watch the porn, women watch
the soaps. Same shit, different gender."
What exactly makes either of these activities 'perverted' ?
I think based on the percentage of men who watch porn the it would make
it more normal than anything else - type of porn depending :)
I think you just felt like calling something perverted.
Perhaps you feel perverted.
Editor's Note: I didn't mean to imply that watching porn or soap operas was perverted, I was just pointing out the visceral vs. emotional differences in men and women in general. Maybe it was a mistake, but I opted not to invoke any names of planets. (JR)
November 17, 2003 at 11:13:00
Subject: Anal Sex
I want to agree with the anal sex comment...but let me give
Say you're with that special lady, and have been having a great time,
but for reasons beyond your control, you wind up without protection.
Now granted, there are alternatives in your choice of action, but not
really uh...well anyway. My question is, in principal do you still
object to said anal sex?
Cause, it's not like I have some sort of crushing secret to
reveal...uh...I mean...hypothetically, of course.
Editor's Note: Ayn Rand said that "all love is exception making". And although I can't say with confidence whether she made this particular exception, I will say that I agree with her in general. But what's with the dirty secrets? You must think my paycheck comes from Springer. (JR)
November 16, 2003 at 23:42:36
Subject: re: editor's note
"America getting attacked on September 11 is more like a
bicyclist wearing red in the middle of the day and encountering some
fucking psychopath in a beat-up Pinto who wants to run over everything in
red. (JR) "
i take it you feel that the attacks had nothing to do with the US
policy and/or actions taken in the middle east.
Editor's Note: More specifically, the lack of actions by the US in the Middle East. (JR)
November 16, 2003 at 02:14:53
Name: You don't understand China
Subject: A Call to Boycott the 2008 Olympic Games in BJ
In my opinion you should study more about China before you
write this article. It is obvious that some people still hold
misapprehensive point of views toward fast-developing China, I am sure that you
haven't been to China, you haven't been to Beijing and see the great
changes that have taken place there. Is is a fact that China's democracy
is not as good as some western counties, but why not compare china's
today to 20 years ago and you would certainly see the differences. China
is now becoming more democratic, more free, although not as democratic
as the US, but the Chinese gov need time to make progresses, you can not
force them to change china to a completely free country in one night.
The 2008 olympic is a chance for China to say: We are changing! We are
joining you! to the whole world. You seems don't want to give this
chance to China at all do you? You said" how many Chinese women are getting
forced abortions " the fact is that china now already has more than 1.3
billion people, if so many people live in the US, i am sure the US gov
would also force US women get abortions. You said "What evidence of
possible terrorism do you need, if not a nuclear missile pointing at you?"
Well, do you actually count how many chinese and russia cities, or even
cities in France and Britain are pointed by the US's nuclear missiles?
Don't you know that the US has more nuclear missles that any other
counties in the world? According to your logic, isn't US also a terrorist
to China? to Russia? to the couties who have nuclear powers?because US
owns the largest amount of nulcear weapons and we need our own weapens
for defence? If it is right for the US to keep so many nuclear weapons,
why wouldn't for other coutires? Who give US the rights to be the
police of the world? Anyway, as to China, don't stick to " communist China"
all the time, China is now changing, and she hopes the world can see
her changes, although there are still lots of things to be done, she is
moving, proceeding to democracy world.
Editor's Note: I know it sounds sweet to say "China is changing", but when they stop using political prisoners' organs in medical transplants, I'll be happy to watch them play a game of volleyball. Your rationalization of forced abortions is especially touching. (JR)
November 14, 2003 at 09:34:48
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